Error: template '../' not found Hrothbert of Bainbridge ~ Advice from the Always Quotable Bob
 From the mouth of Bob

On the value of education:

Harry: I dropped out of High School, remember?

Bob: And you wonder why your life is an unending series of insurmountable intellectual, financial, and emotional hurdles.

On Children:

Where there are children, there is snot.

Bob actually cares. Really. Seriously. Bob does care.

Harry: I won't take money off a kid.

Bob: I know, I know. I also know that if there is any truth to his claim, and he were to be harmed you would never forgive yourself.

And I'd have to endure months of self-flagellation, so don't take his money, but do take him at his word.

Bob's view on cooking:

Harry ~ Can you check the garlic bread?

Bob: Why? I'm not eating.

Bob's view on cooking: Part II

Bob: Life is pain. So's dinner. You've burnt your garlic bread.

Bob on girls:

Bob: (After Harry explains that he got beaten up by a ghost). Maybe she wanted company. You know, I'm not doing anything. Maybe I could find her frequency. Chat her up.

Harry: Her father would love that.

Bob: It could be our secret.

More Bob on girls:

Bob: Was she built?

Harry: Will you stop!

Bob: It's just a simple question. (beat) Oh, just to able to touch a woman again.

Harry: Like you had a chance?

Bob: And you do? Have you taken a look at yourself lately? Not exactly the picture of elegance.

Bob on love:

It's a fallacy. There's no such thing as love. It's just a biochemical reaction that ends with hiring a detective to settle scores. Come on, Harry, you know there's no such thing as love.

Bob on Harry's crusades for justice:

Bob:(Sighing) I detect another looming quixotic campaign on the horizon.

Bob: That Egyptian mumbo jumbo is not my forte.

Bob's not afraid to tell Harry exactly how he feels.

Harry: How do you know what I'm thinking? Are you inside my head?

Bob: I would take a peek except for that fact that it's pretty clear that narcissism and bad judgment are blocking the door...

Or that Harry doesn't appreciate him.

Harry: You love this, aren't you?

Bob: What?

Harry: Me saying you were right.

Bob: Oooooh very much, and one can never hear it enough.

Harry: I'm such an idiot.

Bob: No argument here.

Harry: She used me!

Bob: That Bitch!

Bob also doesn't hold back any punches when he tells Harry that he's not being very considerate of Bob's needs. (Yes, a ghost in a skull has needs.)

Bob: (of sheltering Bianca) Have you even considered the consequences here?

Harry: Uh, haven't got around to that yet.

Bob: Well let me enlighten you: If they catch you with her, she's dead, you're dead, and I'm... homeless.

Bianca: How do you live with him?

Harry: Sometimes I wonder.

Bob: Oh, it's no walk in the park for me either, darling... Ever! Most days, I just walk from here to there and back again.

Harry: Bob! Please!

Bob: God, I am doomed.

Harry: Yeah you're doomed! You live in a skull. Now shut up and get in it!

: All right. (whispers) But at least take some precaution. You can't trust her.

: Bob? I can hear you.

Harry: Oh, I want you to hear me. I'll be in the lab if you need me.